Beware of the Beige Corolla

Man, I hate these things!! Whenever I see someone driving one of these cars, I try and avoid them. It always seems they are driving too slow, hogging the left on the highway, or the person is driving like an idiot. There is something about these cars, that make people lose all common sense. These cars have to be the most boring things on the planet. Maybe it's boring, un-interesting people who are driving them. I don't understand what it is about these machines that turns anyone who drives them into brain-dead zombies. I wish all these cars could be gathered up and put into the crusher, it would make the world a better place to live.

Sometimes You Gotta Say....WTF??!!

Grr....after having a couple of rough days with a 7 year old with attitude, sometimes you have to find things to make you laugh. Our friend Heather showed this to me. So, when things get rough, and too much to bear keep this phrase in mind.

Rockin Out on Sesame Street

I remember watching this when I was a kid. There's nobody funkier than Stevie!

Don't Give Up

Despite Popular Opinion...I'm Not a Fuck-Up

I know people don't really think this way of me.. but sometimes I wonder. I have basically felt this way most of my life. That I was underachieving. I can look back at all the different points in my life, especially all through school and see it right away. All my report cards said the same thing. "Could do better" and "If he applied himself". It was a toss up between if I was lazy or just not trying. I frustrated my parents endlessly with homework and assignments, because they knew I was smart. I have no problem remembering things that seem trivial ( to some people). Stuff about movies, tv shows, baseball statistics, comics, antique cars.
Focusing on the task at hand has always seemed to be a problem for me. Much of my working life has been the same. I have always managed to hold down a job for the most part. But I have never really been successful, or progressed into management. And overall, the jobs I've had, have been boring, uninteresting and unfulfilling. For years, I have struggled to figure out where my interests lie, and to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. At my current job, I come home hating it. But I'm thankful I made it through anotehr day without flipping out or getting fired or any major mishaps. I find I have to psych myself up in the morning, and for a few minutes in the car before 8am. Often during the day, I have feelings of anxiety and being overwhelmed, and that I can't do this job. This, has many times led into depression, feeling like a failure and low self-esteem. The only thing I feel that I'm good at, is being a father. Even then there has been some major issues.
I have really been having a hard time dealing with this lately. After much debate with the Lovely One, and some online tests, she has made me realize that I probably have undiagnosed adult ADHD. It only took her three years to do this. I realize that online tests don't really make anything official, but going over everything and the various answers, I can see my whole life in the test results. It really explained a lot, and I feel better knowing there is a cause for what has been happening for my whole life. And I have started reading information on line and I attended my first support group meeting last week.The group is mainly for parents with ADHD children (our daughter Rhyme Girl), but there is also some overlap with the group. Several adults there have found out they have ADHD that hadn't been diagnosed until later in life. And also a few parents have children with ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder) like our son, Little Man. What really amazed me was that, all these other parents were exactly the same as me, facing the same issues and problems. And the fact that I wasn't alone. I'm not sure how I am going to move on from here, but hopefully this can bring some more understanding about myself.

Still Here...

Just to let everyone know, I haven't fallen of the planet. Between the new baby(as opposed to an OLD baby, jeez...sometimes I'm such a moron), trying to figure out a new schedule, getting in a quick nap whenever we can, and my cat Josie passing away, there hasn't been much time for anything. I have been surfing around, just catching up on blogs, and not really doing anything where I have to concentrate and think too much.I was amazed to find out today was Thursday. I think I got Cara's pregnancy brain. Anyway, I'll be putting up some more baby pictures soon, and writing about the new adventures of parenthood. Till then...adieu

RIP Josie

My cat Josie died tonight in my arms. She was old and smelly, but I loved her a great deal. I noticed she had been acting weird the last few days, all of a sudden she just went downhill really, really fast. I think she was about 16. I loved the way whenever I lay down on the couch with a blanket on, she would jump up and cuddle with me. I usually ended up falling asleep with her lying on me, so we ended up calling her "Nap Cat". When she was younger I used to roll up little balls of tin foil and she would chase after them when I threw them. And whenever we had fish or chicken for dinner, or open up a can of tuna, she would sit and meow until she got some. She loved tuna juice. She was quite a character, my old Josers. Even though I realized her days were numbered, I didn't think she would fail so fast. I'm going to miss my smelly old Josers.