Wednesday, December 2, 2009


Most times when something is not right in our lives, Change is good. If it is your attitude, your job, your living situation, feeling negative about yourself, then you have to recognize what is not working for you and make that your goal. If it is a bad habit, then do something new long enough to become a new habit. The steps to bring about a change in your life are:

Self Recognition
Realization of Self Worth
A good self-image, or wanting a good self-image
Look in the mirror realistically (looking at yourself)
Reframing your priorities
Recognizing warning signs/patterns
Hard work and effort
Wanting to change, not doing it because someone told you to

It also starts with how we look at things and how we phrase things. Instead of saying "I hate when you do that" try to make it positive and constructive instead of argumentative. Try something like "It really makes me angry when you do that and this is why I feel this way". Maybe in not so many words, but you get the general idea. It is ok to be angry. It is a normal, healthy emotion just like being happy or sad. The trick is to realize what's coming and recognize the warning signs. Our bodies actually go through physical changes when anger is upon us. Blood pressure rises, we get short of breath, our voices rise, some people shake or cry. The anger inside of you is like a volcano getting ready to erupt. When you can realize what is happening then you can change your reaction and use your emotions constructively.
Communication with yourself and with others is also the key to change and improving your life. Sometimes it takes some pressure and suggestions from the main people in our lives. Sometimes it takes an ultimatum. Or an introspective look at ourselves and to realize things are not working in our lives. If you want to change bad enough, be positive, stay tough on yourself, persevere and work hard. The good things you are striving for will come into your life.


  1. Ohhhh I need a change. THank you for writing this post. I needed some change motivation. =)

    Your so right too btw with the Plz & the Ltr. It drives me nuts. =)

    Hope you find the change your looking for too.

  2. You're welcome. I have been thinking about this stuff for awhile. It is part of the Anger Management sessions I have been taking. Glad you enjoyed it.

  3. Fabulous post Tony! It's amazing how much good self-talk does. I do it most mornings when the alarm goes off at stupid-o'clock. LOL.
    But seriously, I really commend you for taking the anger management classes and looking a little deeper, and trying to change and make things better. Good on ya man. More posts like this would be amazing ... you have a lot of great stuff to say ... love to hear it!
    Looking forward to seeing you and S.C. on Sat.

  4. Well said bud! Sometimes we have to take a different approach if we expect to get different results.

    It's made me happy to see more positive posts from you.